What It's Like To Lose A Friend On The Trail

When I was a sophomore in high school, he was a senior. Getting to hang out with the older kids was always cool, you know how that is. After training jiu jitsu every day of my life for the previous 5 years, I'd considered myself a pretty high level athlete. My ego probably boasted a little too much about my level of fitness. He and another buddy convinced me to run cross country that year. I didn't know how to run distance, I didn't know how that kind of team environment worked, and I'd never taken any time off from jiu jitsu under my own will power. 

Bryan Marugg, BJJ black belt, grapples with a student.

It was a beautiful thing, cross country. I'd never suffered so much before in my life, but I had never had so much fun, either. The summer training was the best, running 6 to 10 miles a day, laughing at each others pain and pushing the team to a new level. He was on varsity, so I didn't get to run with him too much. I ended up quitting the XC team to compete in the Oregon Open jiu jitsu championships. When school started, we had a P.E class together, so we saw more of each other there. He smiled a lot. His example of how to live life taught me a lot: that it's possible to be competitive without a temper, that you can be thoughtful and kind even to people you don't really like. He always asked me questions that challenged my thinking, too. Honestly, I was that asshole kid who would do whatever it took to win. No matter how dumb I was, he was always there, gentle and kindly spoken.

He graduated high school that year and went off to college. I missed him, but I knew he was happy. He was off adventuring and doing exactly what he taught me to do: living life.  We wouldn't see each other ever again.

November 14, 2017 1:02 PM

This last weekend, I received news that he had died in a hiking accident. Some people might get scared because he died out there; some people might not want to go out again because it reminds them of him. Not me. Not me at all. He enjoyed the outdoors; running, hiking, biking, hammocking. He enjoyed them all the time, and so will I. While college seems to put a damper on my adventure life and my budget, here is my commitment to appreciating the wonderful world God has given us.

I love you Tristan. Rest in peace, buddy.

Tyler